We’ve all heard of ghosting—when someone vanishes into thin air mid-conversation—but have you ever experienced zombieing? It’s when an ex, who once disappeared without explanation, suddenly comes back into your life like nothing ever happened. No apologies, no acknowledgment of the hurt they caused—just a casual, “Hey, how’ve you been?” It’s equal parts confusing and infuriating, but also, weirdly enough, a little intriguing.

Why Do People Zombie?

Honestly, it’s kind of a mix of audacity and convenience. Some people return because they feel guilty but don’t know how to say so (pro tip: saying sorry works wonders). Others pop back in because they’re bored, lonely, or looking for an ego boost. There’s also the possibility they’ve realized they made a mistake and genuinely want a second chance. But here’s the kicker: zombieing almost always starts with no apology. It’s as if they expect you to forget the emotional rollercoaster they left you on.

How to Recognize Zombieing

It might start with a random text out of nowhere—a meme, a song recommendation, or that dreaded “You up?” message. Here are some telltale signs:

• No accountability: They ignore or downplay the fact they ghosted you.
• Casual tone: They act like nothing ever happened.
• Unexpected timing: They return during a vulnerable moment, like after a breakup or on a holiday.

How to Respond to a Zombie Ex

Dealing with zombieing can be tricky—do you let them back in or shut the door firmly? Here are some approaches:

• Set boundaries: If you’re not ready to talk or don’t want them in your life, say so clearly.
• Ask for accountability: Call them out on their ghosting and see if they’re willing to explain themselves.
• Trust your gut: If their return feels insincere or self-serving, you’re probably right.

Zombieing is a frustrating yet all-too-common phenomenon in modern dating. It’s a reminder to protect your peace and prioritize relationships that value communication and respect. If an ex returns without apologizing, you have every right to question their intentions.